Saturday, May 31, 2014

30 Years Wise: How To Grow Up At 30


     Well today I am 30 years young, can you all believe it? I feel like I am entering my 30th year with kind a few bags of sadness, fear, and confusion on my back. I was hoping that when the day came I would feel lite as a feather and serene. Truth is, life just isn't like that. We will always begin to have doubts and concerns about what lay ahead, trick is accepting that as being perfectly ok, because once you stop being angry with yourself about your own emotions, they don't have the steering wheel anymore, you do and now they are just passengers. 

    Passengers in a vehicle that is driving to each needed destination to drop them off and empty the car till the only needed person is the one behind the wheel...YOURSELF completely. I enter this next decade in my life with lots of knowledge, wisdom, love, and experience. I enter this year with new hope and understanding of who I am and what I really want from life. Do I have life all figured out yet? NOPE. Kinda makes me laugh thinking about how many adults in their 30's put on a charade for me growing up, as if they knew all there was to know about life and had everything down to a science. LOL 

    I'm glad I have concerns about who I am, because it means there is much more to discover. I am glad I've not realized all my dreams yet, because what would there be left worthy of the thrill of such a chase? I'm grateful for the fear and uncertainty because it means I am human, and I am growing, and growing is one of the scariest, invigorating, disheartening, and beautiful things you can ever do in this life. We are always growing, the rate at which we grow depends solely on how hard we fight the process.

     This year will be marked with many growing periods that I will remember and honor for the rest of my physical journey. Confidence and a growing sense of true freedom will also mark this year in my personal history book. 2 years ago, I was a depressed, broken, wounded girl who did terrible things in the name of suffering and tried to manipulate love out of anyone who would give it to me. I was in a constant state of belief that life was just HAPPENING TO ME. Then I discovered a truth, it was not through good friends, though they are precious beyond measure and in abundance in my life, it was not through a church sermon, though I still see the beauty in that even though you have to squint to see it sometimes haha, it was INSIDE OF ME, the entire time. 

    "You're the only one who holds the key to your healing." thats an amazing quote from Angel Haze <3 I truly did hold the key to my healing, the elixir to my sickness, I was the answer to my prayer, the divine to my natural. I discovered this through a grieving period, in which unlike most of us, I finally decided to really take the time. I broke down into the grief process, I grieved my ex girlfriend fully, not allowing anyone around me to dictate what that grief should look like, feel like, or how long it should last. I allowed myself to really feel it, instead of pretending it wasn't there and shoving it down like we so often do. It was in that grieving that I discovered I was healing myself, by allowing myself to be real with me, I was literally going back through years of pain and grieving for real, for the first time.

     Grieve properly my loves, that's one of the keys to an amazing life. Find out what that looks like for you, and find some trusted professionals who understand what it means, and go with it...let it flow till you are stronger and more at peace. Another piece of sound advice, you will never find what you are looking for outside of yourself. It sounds cliche but it is so true. No one can love you, heal you, help you, or be good to you like YOU can be. When you are fully loving yourself, it will be so easy to love others in a more enlightened manner. How do you love yourself? Well truly adore you, treat yourself as if you were in love, fall in love with you. In the past 5 years I have done many things. 

    From 25 to now I have experienced so much. I lived in Nashville for 2 years, I toured the entire country by myself twice for 8 long months, nothing but a guitar and some hope, I came out as bisexual, I was denied Christmas dinner the first year my mother knew, My father got diagnosed with cancer and beat it, my mother got diagnosed with cancer and we are all fighting for her, I fell in love with a woman who had a pill abuse problem and a self identifying problem, and I gave up my virginity to her. Yep thats right, 29 was the year I finally made the leap. lol Still need to do that with a man, but I am not pimping myself out just yet haha.

      It was painful losing my ex, but in all her horribleness, in all the abuse I suffered at her hand...I found something extraordinary. I found God. (DON'T STOP READING, let me explain) I'd always believed I was a christian, I even used to be quite the bible belter haha, but it wasn't till I stopped caring what God thought of me that I truly met with him, her, them face to face. When I let go of the worry he wouldn't love me, and decided I didn't need anyone else's love but mine, clear as a bell it rang inside me...I am deity. I am the divine and the divine is me. God and humans are not a separate thing. So my last and final piece of advice, let go of all the things you believe you have to be, because of others expectations, because of a God's holiness, because of where you live, grew up, or where you can make the most money...let it all go and just ask yourself an honest question and really examine the answer you give...this will take a process of really digging deep beyond the lies you've told yourself, and ask yourself "Who do I really want to be?" As this 30th year breaks forth, I will be mindful of asking myself that again and again and again. Happy Birthday Francey, this one's gunna be the best yet <3

Monday, May 26, 2014

Hollywood Street Rat

Hollywood Street Rat

Long sleeve shirt
$59 -

IRO leather jacket
$1,360 -

Versus green jeans
$480 -

Lace up boots
$24 -

Heart jewelry

River Island hair accessory
$10 -

Polyvore Picks 5/27/2014

It's that time again! Time for me to share a few more of my Polyvore Creations with you lovelies! Hope ya like these 2 fine and dandys I chose today!

This post's picks is all about the opposites! And that rhymed! Yay I'm a rapper! lol Anywho...the above outfit is a perfect sweetheart look for a cool summer night out with friends! Dance the night away or hit the pier for a cocktail party with that special someone!

The outfit below is called PinUp Business Meeting, I LOVE PIN UP STYLE! But I also love looking like I know exactly what I want and how to get it ON MY OWN. So this outfit is perfect for an office meeting, especially if you're the one in charge and make all the rules...and rule 1 in my office, there are no rules ;)

till next time lovers
remember to be

YUMtastic!: Spicy Chacon!

Hot Garlic Chacon!

No chacon is not a real word, I made it up because after you hear how much bacon goes into this recipe, it will seem as though the chicken and bacon become ONE!

What you need...

1. a packet of maple flavored or regular flavored bacon
2. Chili Garlic sauce
3. Sriracha
4. Chicken breasts with skin
5. Agave Nectar
6. Some salt, pepper, and olive oil for taste!

Take the chicken breasts and stuff 1 piece of bacon underneath their skins!

Then take 1 to 2 pieces more and wrap the chicken in the bacon, almost as if creating a belt. If you want to secure it tightly place tooth picks!

Then in a separate bowl mix chili garlic sauce, sriracha, and agave!
This recipe is open, so mix as much as you think you will need to coat the chicken, if you do 2 pieces probably a few tablespoons will suffice of each thing, but if you do more you should maybe do a cup of each, they need to be equal parts, unless you prefer to alter the taste from being either more spicy or more sweet!

Now after mixing it up, slather the chicken in it generously, you can even shove some under the skin!

Now in a pan with olive oil fry and sear the chicken, cover it and let it cook for about 20 minutes! Add salt and pepper to your taste!

Now you can either eat the chicken like this, as long as it's all cooked through, or you can place it in the oven for another 20 to 30 minutes and let bacon and skin get nice and crispy! Place oven at 375, first 15 mins should be on bake and the last bit should be on broil!

Be Blessed & may all your meals be YUMtastic!
cheers, Francey the Foodie <3

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Polyvore Picks 5/24/2014

This installment's Polyvore picks are 3 of my creations! Enjoy!

The first is obviously inspired by Dean Winchester from my favorite show Supernatural, and the second ensemble is a yogi earth friend Costa rica number, while the third is a bohemian punk rocker look :) Hope ya like em!

Black Butler Yudabest!

Welcome to the unofficial, international, pretend country of Yudabest! Here you will find actors, shows, comics, clothes, creations, inventions, people who are simply DA BEST! Today we are honoring a special citizen...BLACK BUTLER!

I know a lot of Anime fans are gunna scoff at me for this one. LOL I am a little late to the Black Butler party, but either way this Anime is, in my opinion, one of DA BEST I've ever seen!
Now I just finished the first season which is centralized around demon butler, Sebastian, and his contracted Lord, Ciel Phantomhive. Ciel's back story is horrid. His parents were murdered by a sick cult, then as they tortured Ciel he did the unthinkable...he called on a demon to rescue him and aide him in enacting deadly revenge on his parent's murderers. 

This anime has so many different relational connections and story lines. The 2nd season features a new young boy and his butler relationship between a bratty asshole named Alois and his butler Claude. Ciel and Sebastian show up again, but to be honest I am just now starting the 2nd season, so this Yudabest review will be of just season 1.

The anime is set in England during the reign of Queen Victoria and Ciel, as young as he is, being the last living heir to the Phantomhive family is her guard dog, basically the middle man between civilized society and the underworld. What I find most alluring about this show is the strained yet passionate bond between Ciel and Sebastian. At times father and son-ish, other times cold acquaintances...but the best is the homo-erotic borderline romantic nature their relationship takes on from time to time. Though he's 13 and essentially Sebastian's body is a grown man, you almost wish and hope they kiss or pledge their unspoken LOVE out loud to one another.
Those moments when Sebastian makes an off the cuff remark about how much he admires Ciel's determination and strength, or when Sebastian yet again rescue's Ciel from utter annihilation, it is in the breath of those small seconds that your heart stops, they stare at each other with an unknowable longing neither of them is familiar with, or perhaps scared of, and all you can do is repeat inside your head "Tell him you love him!"

Is that wrong? I mean I dunno, Sebastian is a demon after all, he's ageless, exists beyond time. Ciel is one of the most mature 13 year old boys in existence, mainly because he watched his family being slaughtered, oh and then there's the whole "Once my revenge is through you can eat my soul" thing. HAHA. 

Anime is a very odd and boundary pushing type of art, it's not for everyone but I will say this...I am not even a HUGE anime fan, I like it and I have shows and movies I love, but I haven't even read a Manga, and yet this show 100% hooked me from the very first episode. Now I am sure my next piece of advice is going to issue me some judgement from the anime community, but I watch the show in English dub, mainly because I really love the voice actors they chose for that version. However if you find that you enjoy the Japanese version with subtitles, cool, and hey if you understand Japanese and don't need subtitles well then...go on with yo bad self! ;) 
Another awesome thing about this show, hell any Anime is of course      ...      THE COSPLAY!

If you are unsure of what cosplay is or who these people are portraying from the show, I strongly suggest you Google it and explore the world of anime deeply, cause IT'S AWESOME.
So as the proud Queen of Yudabest I officially declare this anime FRANtastic, so Black Butler...YU DA BEST! :)

till next time lovers
remember to be

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Polyvore Picks (5/20/2014)

It's that time again! Time for a few more amazing Polyvore Picks! Today I include 2 of my own and one made by a talented Pinterester called Disney Bound! She has a blog, check it out!

First up ANCHORS AWAY! The first outfit was inspired by my 2 fashion loves...Anchors and dorky chico hats :) The pants are a plus! This outfit would be more for a cool spring day on the pier in Maine or an early Fall afternoon at the farmer's market in your city!

 The next outfit is another anchor covered beauty, but this outfit is more suited for a fun day at the beach or an awesome day out on a boat drinking with friends! The little crab bag and the earrings are to die for!
 Last but not least we have a Peter Pan inspired outfit by one of my fav style queens, DISNEYBOUND! Check her out on Pinterest, her stuff is killer! I love the incorporation of feathers and the green dress is just too cute!
till next time lovers
remember to be